That’s right people, today marks the official start of March Madness with the First Four beginning tonight as Fairleigh Dickinson meets Prairie View A&M for the right to get slaughtered by Duke and Temple play Belmont in the night cap. Now the action doesn’t really get going until Thursday when we have a full slate of games starting at 11AM going all the way to 9PM or as I like to call Gambling Heaven or Hell depending how the games go. The goal is to make it out of the first slate of games without feeling like this kid.
That kid has been all of us if you have been gambling long enough. You know the scenario, here you are holding a -9 ticket cause why bet an underdog right? praying some freshman from Newport, Virginia just hits 1 free throw to give you that push that you are now wishing to the heavens cause you put way too much money on this stupid 3-14 matchup cause it’s the first game of the tournament. We all know what happens, the kid goes up to the free throw line shaking in his shoes and completely bricks the first shot. All I need is one you whisper to yourself hands held above your head eyes closed volume up on the TV and hear the clang off the back rim and the ball bounces high and caroms off for a miss and here you are in your living room cursing this poor freshman out for missing two free throws and losing way too much money on this game.
That happens all the time if you gamble, nothing worse than a bad beat but nothing more exhilarating than a great win. Just stop they say. Never cause it’s March and my Dad raised me not to quit unless you are easily outmatched then just say fuck this and leave but as a gambler I will not quit til I wind up homeless.
P.S. Everyone I bet on please win and cover, this is not satire I need to win all my bets this year.